30.11.2010

Tomorrow it is december. Yesterday the coldest temperature in Sweden was -30.9 degree Celsius and yet it was only november. There is a facebook group called '"Man, It's cold!" " Bitch PLZ! I'm from Sweden! You have not SEEN cold!"' and it could not be more accurate. It is so cold that my face is freezing to ice every time I leave my house. I am not kidding. And the winter is the season where you feel fat, pale and unsexy. Another three month of this? Can not wait!

29.11.2010

Lately I have not been studying at all. It has not been on my agenda, even though it has been needed. I am lacking motivation like crazy. It is sad. Soon exam week is coming up, I have to finish some internal assessments and I have my theory test for my driver's license. I need to pass that test so bad! I need to make it, for my own sake. However, today the sun is shining and even though it is freezing outside, the snow is beautiful. Although, around 4 o'clock darkness will have struck and I will feel down and unmotivated again. Lovely, huh? I hate the darkness.

Salty Lips

Salty lips telling lies

Let them talk, let them fantasize

20.11.2010

It is always about her, where ever we go. She does not even need to be there for all of it to be about her. It is like my existence does not make a difference because it is always about her. I do not even know if she is aware of how everything is revolved around her. And she seems to have it all without even trying, whilst I try and I try so hard. But failure seems to be on my side no matter what I try to achieve.

18.11.2010

Lack of communication. I can not understand what is up with people whom can not communicate with the people around them. Do they have some kind of mental break when it comes to communicating, or what? It is driving me insane from times to times. I have a need and that need is to talk. Talking with the people whom I care about. If that needs is not fulfilled for one reason or another, I get stingy. But when the same person seem unable to talk to you, over and over again, it is stretching the limits for my part.

8.11.2010

I am so exhausted. I can not even begin to explain how tired I actually am. My entire body hurts. Especially my toes, as they got broken last year and I think they are healing in a weird way. They are all crooked and they hurt as hell. Painkillers, please. My extended essay is due friday and since I have been working on it for six months, it is a big fking deal. However, I have written 3711 words (4000 words is the maximum) and I am pretty much done now. I need to write an abstract and talk to my supervisor this week, but besides that - I am done. Do you understand how good that feels?

7.11.2010

Does TV have to show programmes about women with eating disorders when I am sitting on the sofa, eating candy and chocolate? It does not make me feel better, it makes me feel very conscious. I dislike it. I just switched the channel, now I feel less conscious. Except for the fact that they all look really good and since I am hung over, let us just say I do not look as good right now. Now I feel conscious about that instead. Great.

5.11.2010

Okay, so I have not written anything lately. Nevertheless, I had such a wonderful day yesterday! My friend Maja and I started our day at a museum called "Fotografiska" here in Stockholm, as there was an exhibition on fashion from 1920-2009. It was amazing! I especially loved Man Ray and Irving Penn's pictures. Then we went to eat lunch and some dessert before we headed to a little concert and signing with Daniel Adams-Ray. It was so much fun! Now my grandparents are coming over really soon and my dad, my grandpa and I are going to the Mc Collection and I am very excited, as I have never been there before. Tonight I am going to the movies with my friend Tobias too.

1.11.2010

So I know I have not written much lately but I have not had anything in particular to write about. So what have I been up to? I just went on a break, our autumn break and I am trying to finish up my Extended Essay. It is almost done, I have less than 700 words left and since the complete essay should be 4000 words long, 700 words is not much in comparison. Nevertheless, it is really nice to finally be on a break! I can stay up as long as I want and I can sleep in every morning. And I can study during the day and hang out with the people I love during the evenings. That is the way my life should be.